At this moment in time life is steady and almost routine. I'm not complaining at all about that because I think there's comfort in routine. I've been working and enjoying time off from being a football mom. But kind of looking forward to the excitement of our next football season as crazy as that sounds.… Continue reading January
Tag: love
It’s 2022… A 2021 recap
To say that time flies by is an understatement. I mean... time really does get away from us. I haven't posted anything since February 2021. That's INSANE. BJ is eleven and B2 is seven and my heart is full. Today I read back over all of my "walking wounded posts." I've been feeling funky and… Continue reading It’s 2022… A 2021 recap
Valentine’s Day
Today I miss having someone to love. It sounds so flippant. Of course there’s BJ and B2 but that’s different, that’s maternal. Today I miss really loving someone. The happiness that you feel thinking about the person you love. The security in having a person in that capacity. And definitely/of course being loved in return.… Continue reading Valentine’s Day
The grief monster
I've written before about this time of year, the time of year leading up to the day the bottom fell out. Somewhere in between BJ's birthday and February I start feeling like my nerve endings are starting to fray. Everything I touch I feel, like I've been partially holding my breath because I can't quite… Continue reading The grief monster
2018 Year end review
There are only 4 more days left of 2018... FOUR MORE DAYS. It seems like only yesterday I was running into 2018 with optimism hope for love and happiness and all things positive. https://fightingformysunshine.com/2018/01/02/happy-new-year-2018/ And here we are... a year has passed. But not much else has changed. Don't get me wrong... there's been growth.… Continue reading 2018 Year end review
My boys
We pray every night. We ask God to cover all that is special to us, we thank him for all of our blessings, and in those prayers we thank God for each other. I can't begin to thank God enough for the blessings that are the both of you. The night before last B2, you… Continue reading My boys
Here we are…
I look at my youngest and think about how fast time is flying and how quickly his toddler days are going by and my brain flashes back to when he was an infant. I think about how confused and tired and overwhelmingly sad I was during that time. Being widowed while pregnant was such an… Continue reading Here we are…
Happy New Year #2018
When the clock struck midnight this year I was laughing... LAUGHING. Who'da thunk it? I have cried my way into the New Year every single year since B died. There's something sad about starting another year... by yourself. Going into yet another year without a loved one. I remember when I could tell you the… Continue reading Happy New Year #2018
I saw this this morning…
I saw this meme this morning... and it spoke to me. Some days I feel like I've grown so much... and then others I feel like I haven't gotten anywhere on this journey. Everything I do that is out of my comfort zone scares the hell of out me. And then I retreat. I… Continue reading I saw this this morning…
To my boys
Hey boys, I've never written you a joint letter before but I thought I'd give it a try today. BJ you are 7 right now and B2 you're 3 years old. Christmas will be here in a few days and your level of energy and enthusiasm for life is amazing and exhausting. Right now B2,… Continue reading To my boys
Fighting For my Sunshine 